9 Strategies to BUST through the Fear (#1 is my go-to strategy!)
“I realize there’s something incredibly honest about trees in winter, how they’re experts at letting things go.”Jeffrey McDaniel
Let’s pick up where we left off… If you haven’t read my previous blog on New Beginnings (and it really is required reading if you’re looking to start something new), check out PART ONE – HERE
New Beginnings Part 1 – Recap
New beginnings are always available to us. At times, they are forced upon us by life’s circumstances. Therefore, the choice is already made. However, you always have the choice of going into a situation where change is required with intention and a plan or kicking and screaming. The outcome is still the same – the change HAPPENS. To clarify, the difference is your approach and the additional discomfort you bring to yourself by trying to delay the inevitable.
We Crave New Beginnings
I strongly believe that we, as humans, crave new beginnings. For the most part, it is our way of evolving and growing. It is an innate calling in all of us. Our soul requires growth. The deep spiritual side within us all, requires us to expand our experiences by learning more about ourselves and the world around us. Thus, transformation and new beginnings are about testing the limits of our greatest potential.
Let’s clarify some misunderstandings about transformation and new beginnings.
It’s not an all or nothing proposition. Leaving your job, your family, or your home is not required to begin a transformational journey. When we fear change, we tend to think in absolutes. The all or nothing mindset is what trips us up and has us resisting the change that is inevitable.
Transformation REALLY is about the journey
I really hate to pull out that old card again. Undoubtedly, you have heard this old adage a million times. The fact is it couldn’t be truer. Transformation is not about the “THING” we acquire or achieve. If transformation is embarked upon with self-awareness, the purpose is what we learn about ourselves and the pursuit of reaching our highest potential. For this reason, it’s about overcoming those internal blocks that prevent us from taking a chance and making a change.
You don’t need to give up what you currently have to create a new beginning.
Moreover, new beginnings are not about restriction and limitation. It is absolutely about expansion and specifically expanding in those areas in your life that you secretly (and maybe openly) dream about. The either/or mindset needs to go away. This is a BOTH/AND world. You can achieve your dreams AND take loving care of your family. For this reason, you don’t need to choose between your commitments and your dreams.
Your comfort zone really isn’t that comfortable.
Why would I want to get out of my comfort zone? It’s – well – comfortable ! Maybe not so much. What it is – is familiar. Evolutionarily, we were predisposed to remain with people, in situations, and maintain certain behaviors because of the perception that it would keep us safe from harm. Read here some other reasons why we steer towards familiarity. Why do we like familiarity? – Speeli
Furthermore, comfort is rarely satisfying for too long. We settle in, get comfortable, then we need to change positions. This is the cyclical nature of life and the transformation we MUST experience.
I can absolutely promise you that you will feel a certain level of fear and doubt if you try something new or put yourself out there. Indeed, it comes with the territory. If you’re NOT feeling fear, I would argue, that maybe you’re not taking a big enough chance.
On the other hand, familiarity and comfort can be “NICE”. As a result of maintaining this “NICE” feeling, however, you’ll likely have an incessant and stubborn nagging of what could have been if you took the chance.
What we desire doesn’t auto-magically show up.
Because what we desire doesn’t automatically show up, we need to usher it in. I spend many wasted years attempting to invoke “The Secret” to usher in the new life I thought I was meant to live. My first problem with that approach is that I wasn’t clear on what it is I really wanted. I could give you a list of things I didn’t want but had not explored my desires enough to know what it is that I DID want.
The second problem with that approach is that typically situations and people don’t just show up on our doorstep, announcing that “Change has arrived!” We first need to get clear on what we want and really infuse these desires into our DNA. Once we do that, the steps we need to take to make that dream a reality will materialize and become clearer. You first have to see it, feel it, then you can experience it. Consistent action over time will bring the change you desire.
Unexpectedly, new beginnings are forced on us. Even though, they are not what we would have chosen and yet, they are presented to us as an opportunity to grow and evolve. At times, the fear can be overwhelming. With this in mind, use the tips below to bust through the fear you feel when a life transformation is upon you.
9 Ways to Overcome Fear
- Search for the lesson. If you’re experience a change not of your choosing, ask yourself, “what opportunities are available here for me?” also “What is there to learn about myself or the universe?”
- Letting go of expectations of perfection. When you’re starting something new, having really high expectations of perfect outcome can be dangerous. It’s dangerous because when it is not perfect (perfection is a myth anyway) you may become demotivated to continue. As Voltaire is credited with saying “perfect is the enemy of good”
- Stop future tripping. Identifying each and every worst-case scenario is your fear manifesting itself. “What if’ing” yourself to death before you even begin will surely ensure that you will never arrive at your destination. Check and debunk your assumptions. Challenge your what if’s.
- Accept what is. For example, you may find yourself thinking, “If I had this or that, I’d be able to achieve my goals”, you are inhibiting your transformation. Therefore, it is likely unsurprising that lamenting about not having the perfect circumstances to begin your transformative journey is counterproductive. Accept the conditions that exist right now and work from there.
- Embracing change as a natural part of life. It is clear, we can’t fight it, change will happen regardless of if we want it to or not. Oftentimes, the universe is tricky. If you try too hard to hold onto things just as they are, she’ll likely come along and force you into some sort of change. Preempt her by embracing change.
- Recognize the solid, foundational good things. Recognize you have everything you need right now to begin your journey; therefore, you don’t have to wait for a season, a situation, or a better time. If you need more knowledge in a certain area, there are tons of free available resources. And if you decided that you need more formal teachings to make progress towards your dream, there are countless options available. Time wasted in the uncertainty can never be recaptured.
- Regroup, reassess, re-inventory. Taking a step back to assess your current situation and evaluate where you need to go is not delaying progress. It’s actually assisting in the organization process so that you can move forward with more ease. Take inventory of the knowledge, skills, and abilities you possess. It’s ok to regroup before moving forward. This counts as a step in the right direction.
- Get back up. Things rarely go as planned. Disappointment or rejection may show up. That’s ok. It really is. Don’t stop. Keep pushing. The universe put this obstacle in your way to test your resolve and commitment. If you need to take time to reassess, do it. Every step and every misstep are EXACTLY what you needed to get to the next level. Promise me when this happens that you will find your way to rebound and come back with a newfound fierceness.
- Think Big. Act Small. I want you to dream BIG. But when it comes to taking action, if I’ve said it once, I’ve said it a million times, small actions done consistently get you to the finish line. The problem (I’m raising my hand here) is that we live in a society and maintain a mindset of instant gratification and immediate progress. We want to see those big gains and huge wins. The result is frustration when we don’t see immediate results. Please trust me on this one. It is the lesson I keep reminding myself every day.
Embark on your own Transformational Journey TODAY
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